I wasted many years of happiness convincing those around me to believe in the ideas and goals I had set out for myself. It took me a long time to realize it doesn’t matter, and attempting to change opinions was mentally draining. Sometimes those around you, even those closest to you: it could be your friends, family, or co-workers – don’t fully believe in you.
Of course its harsh, but it’s the truth. Your parents might want you to take the safe route out of high school, go to college, get a degree, and work a job for thirty or more years that you didn’t want in the first place. You’ll look back and wonder what if.
Thinking for myself has been one of my greatest assets in life. Receiving and accepting feedback respectfully is one thing, taking constructive criticism beneficially is a rarity, but letting the thoughts, judgments, and visions that others have set out for you to dictate your life is demoralizing.
I’ve found that I live life using a theory called regret minimization. It’s simple: project yourself forward to the age of eighty. Looking back on your life, you want to minimize the number of regrets. If you project yourself to the age of eighty and think about your potential regret, things get a lot clearer.
Try the new job. Take the gap year. Book the plane ticket. Start the relationship. Make the move.
I never want to catch myself saying what if, playing the tape in your mind over and over years later because someone else dictated it for me. Our time on this Earth is limited, and our memories won’t last forever. Take a risk in which you control the odds – bet on yourself.
Live your life. Pave your path. Dream your dream.
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson
